The Truth About Boundaries

Empowering Your Energy and Self-Love

The Truth About Boundaries: What They Are and What They Aren't

Today, let's dive deep into a topic that’s crucial for both our personal and professional lives—boundaries. Understanding boundaries—what they are, what they aren’t, and why they matter—is essential for our well-being. By the end of this post, you’ll have a clearer understanding of how to set boundaries with love and respect.

Boundaries: The Basics

First, let’s clear up a common misconception: boundaries are not walls to keep people out. They’re not about isolation or rejection. Boundaries are about creating healthy spaces for ourselves. They are really about two things - Respect and Relationships!

Protecting Our Energy, Time, and Emotional Well-Being

When we talk about protecting our energy, we mean ensuring we’re not overextending ourselves or allowing others to drain us. Imagine your energy as a battery. Every interaction either charges or drains it. Boundaries are about our ability to maintain our energy levels rather than blaming others when we get depleted.

I used to feel drained when I spent time with certain people. I had whole stories about how they were energy vampires, which would excuse my tendency to start closing my heart when they were around. You know what I mean, you see someone and you brace, then you ‘shield up’ so that you can protect your energy.

The thing is, this is only necessary when we don’t have clear, healthy boundaries.

With clear and healthy boundaries we can instead purposely keep our heart open (because that’s where we actually get, give, and replenish our energy or life-force from). In this way, we meet the person in that moment without having to close, because they are just being them and we don’t actually have to give them any energy. Or, if we do, we know that we are replenishing that energy, and will continue to do so after they have gone.

Boundaries as Acts of Self-Love and Respect

Boundaries are a profound form of self-care. They teach others how to treat us. When we set clear boundaries, we communicate our needs and values, fostering healthier relationships and a deeper sense of self-worth. Think about it—when you respect your own boundaries, others are more likely to respect them too. It’s about saying, “I value myself enough to prioritize my well-being.”

Setting boundaries also means being honest with yourself and others about what you can and cannot do. It’s not about being rigid but about being true to yourself. For example, if you need time to recharge after work, it’s okay to communicate that to your family or friends. Let them know that you need some space for a certain amount of time to decompress before you can engage fully.

Boundaries Are Not Selfish, Rude, or Aggressive

Now, let’s address what boundaries are not. They’re not selfish, rude, or aggressive. They’re not about controlling others but about empowering ourselves. Boundaries are compassionate and necessary for our holistic wellness. They allow us to show up fully in our lives without resentment or burnout.

It’s important to remember that boundaries are not ultimatums or punishments. They’re not about saying, “You can’t do this,” but rather, “This is what I need.” For instance, instead of saying, “You can’t call me late at night,” you might say, “I need to prioritize my sleep, so let’s talk earlier in the evening.”

How Do You Set Boundaries Without Feeling Guilty?

Many people struggle with guilt when setting boundaries. It’s crucial to understand that taking care of yourself is not selfish. It’s necessary. When you feel guilty, remind yourself that by setting boundaries, you’re creating healthier relationships. You’re also modeling self-respect and teaching others to do the same. Boundaries are one was that we cultivate intimacy (IN TO ME SEE). We do so first with ourselves by exploring out needs, and then with others when we communicate them

Start small. Practice saying no without over-explaining. Be clear and direct. No is a complete sentence. We don’t need to justify it. We can deliver it with kindness - in our eyes, tone of voice, and body language. For example, if you’re unable to attend an event, simply say, “I appreciate the invitation, but I won’t be able to make it.” No need to elaborate unless you feel comfortable doing so.

Ready to Set Boundaries with Love and Respect?

If you’re ready to start setting boundaries with love and respect, I invite you to book a free 15-minute consultation with me. Let’s work together to help you reclaim your energy and well-being.

Remember, it’s okay to say no without guilt. It’s okay to prioritize your peace and well-being. By honoring your boundaries, you honor yourself.

Thanks for reading, and I look forward to traveling with you on your journey to self-sovereignty. Embrace your power, set those loving boundaries, and live a life that truly supports your whole Self.

I see the light in you. And it is brilliant.

Brightest of blessings,

Dawn xo

The Awakening Light

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The Truth About Boundaries.